Thursday, 17th January, 2019

Congress to launch Rashtriya Rajiv Gandhi Secular Mars Mission

06, Nov 2013 By silentsardar

Realizing the sole responsibility entrusted upon itself by the almighty to spread secularism, congress has decided to launch it’s secular mission mars to find out if at all there are any favorable conditions or there is any possibility of secularism being prevalent there.

Spokesperson Manish Tewari informed the press that a separate space agency under the leadership of Rahul Babaji has been formed which will seek to oblige the aliens by injecting introducing them to this copyrighted magical wand.

Tewari further explained that as Rahul Baba is a multifaceted expert, he has already calculated the escape velocity of the satellite required to be put into the orbit of mars and he has specifically directed that the velocity has to be more than his own escapism escape velocity.

The project will be engineered by Dickvijay Singh who was a bit apprehensive initially about his incompetency with the space technology, but Rahul Baba quickly came to his rescue explaining that incompetency is just a “state of mind” and assuring that he has ample experience of venturing into alien territories.

The prime minister has expressed his keenness in the mission is ready to work under the leadership of Rahul Baba, interestingly a security official has revealed that PM was also approached by a leading silencer company to render his great skill, but angered Madamji pulled the curtain down before “theek hai” could be called out.

The space mission also consists of deploying of a robot which is proving to be a costly affair, however madamji has supposedly found solution to this problem by roping in a human robo who has promised to arrange for the finances at 0% interest and further to develop and cultivate crops on mars under the name of National Indira Gandhi mars development mission

P. Chidambram has declared a national scam award to be constituted and given to Robert for the great service and welfare which will be rendered to humanity through this kind act.

When asked by the reporters if it would be more feasible to send some dog beforehand to test the conditions, Tewari replied that is not possible as Jetmalaign has failed to release his doggyness asssharamiji from the kennel.

Meanwhile Mody has promised to implement Gujarat model of development if any life form is found on mars(even bacterial and viral) meanwhile the team headed by P.Chidambum has already started chalking out plans for the corruption..err. construction plans to carried out, while a sadhu has already dreamt of some hidden lu/ost wealth under the surface of mars, however Mr. Kajriwal has claimed that it’s all the black money which has been boforced/burried under the surface of mars, is now looming in the dreams of sadhus, replying to which dickvijay singh has asked for a CBI inquiry as to whether Mr. Kajriwal is a RSS agent as he has backed the claim of a sadhu.