Sunday, 19th August, 2018

Money Laundering Mastermind blames new Harry Potter game

22, May 2018 By mohmaaya

In the recent money laundering scam, the accused felon Viyaj Mallya has blamed the recently launched Harry Potter: Hogwarts Mystery game as the motive for the $10,000 scam.

According to Viyaj, the mastermind of the scam, “In the new Harry Potter game, after every few steps, you have to pay a lot of money (in $) to do tasks or else you have to wait for many hours to ‘gain energy’. As the game progresses, the only way to go to the next spell session or flying lesson or gossip with friends is by buying our way in.”

Image result for harry potter hogwarts mystery energy

“I have 7 potterhead children, one potterhead wife, and two potterhead parents.They all are hooked up to their mobile phones for hours to gain energy to ‘smile’ or to ‘take a break’ in the game. My children think about the energy gained even in their IIT coaching classes, which is troubling me.”

“And the truth is that I am also a big potterhead, and I was frustrated after wasting many hours to get out of the Devil’s snare.”

“So, I decided to find a quick way to earn enough money so as to spend it on the game. Laundering money seemed the easiest in today’s time, and since the game is doing the same to me, it made perfect sense.”

When asked if he regrets being a potterhead now, Viyaj replied, “Not at all. Harry Potter franchise has taught me and my family a lot in life. From Harry Potter books we learnt about bravery and friendship, and now these games have taught us that having shitloads of money is very crucial to buy things like smiles, rest, escape route from problems etc.”

After he blatantly admitted to his crime, Viyaj Mallya has been taken into custody by the police. He is now relieved that in prison cells, at least he will have enough time to gain enough energy in the game.

Image source Tumblr