Chennai, May 28, 2016: The charismatic and much-loved Ms. J. Jayalalithaa, just sworn in as the Chief Minister of Tamil Nadu for a record fifth term, has announced a major policy shift and will end the era of freebies. Named as several Amma schemes, these schemes so far had increased the state debt to nearly Rs. 200,000 crores growing at annual rate of over 90%. But Jayalalitha has always been a visionary and was the one who pioneered the Mid-day meal schemes in schools, which has since spread all over the country and won laurels from World Bank and UNESCO. She now plans to launch three major programs that will significantly alter the economic landscape of the whole country.
Speaking to selected media persons, she announced, “Tamil Nadu will reclaim the glory days of the Sangam period when no one went hungry or thirsty and it was a land of milk, honey and gold. The first of the new programs is called “Six Rivers” aimed at bringing plenty of pure RO water from the six major rivers of the world viz. Amazon, Yangtze, Mississipi, Nile, Zambezi and Danube”. Those in the know say that this is the most audacious scheme ever and will spread water resources equitably across the continents. New technologies will be employed to drill right through the earth. The project will take 20 years and give employment to over 30 million people. The excavations will also unearth large reserves of gold and other precious minerals to Tamil Nadu.
The Indian Geological and Meteorological Society, an NGO, has pooh-poohed the scheme as unworkable. The CM has brushed aside these arguments as unworthy, stating that even now, with all the technology at their command, they are unable to predict the weather for the next day.
The second programme is going to be a parallel benefit of the first program. The ocean water level around Tamil Nadu will recede and reveal the lost Sangam Kingdom, with the world’s most fabulous land of agricultural fertility and mineral wealth.
To fund this project, costing about 7 trillion rupees, the third program, Amma Lakshmi scheme has also been announced. Each woman in Tamil Nadu of voting age will get a solar-powered currency press that will print new Tamil Eelam notes accepted in several countries. Each note of Rs.1000 will have an embedded chip and help track purchasing patterns and inflation. The Amma Lakshmi project will have the technological backing and funding from Flipkart and Apple.
Prof. Thirunavakkarasu, a techno-economic expert, has complimented the CM for the most revolutionary ideas that support supply-side economics and help to end the days of free sewing machines and auto rickshaws. Every citizen of Tamil Nadu will welcome the new era of milk, honey and gold soon.