Britain to rename Mallya as "Kohinoor" before returning him; says stolen diamond returned

21, Apr 2017 By manishpaul

After arresting Vijay Mallya on India’s request, the British government has now decided to rename Vijay Mallya as “Kohinoor” as it feels that he is a diamond for India. The decision came after a cabinet meeting held in London, where the ministers realized that India wanted Mallya as much as the Kohinoor.

“We thought of returning the Kohinoor to India last week. But the Indian government had been requesting Mallya’s extradition to India and we thought of ‘ek teer se do nishaane’“, said Theresa May, the Prime Minister of Britain after the cabinet meeting.

Vijay Mallya upon getting status equivalent to Kohinoor
Vijay Mallya upon getting status equivalent to Kohinoor

The Kohinoor diamond had been taken away by the Britishers during their imperial rule in India. Subsequent government’s have requested Britain to return the diamond but all requests have been willfully ignored. “India has produced two wonderful diamonds. One has a value in millions which we stole from India, the other has stolen millions and has been sent by India. We see both of them as diamonds worth millions and therefore India should be happy that Vijay Kohinoor Mallya is finally returning to India.”, Theresa added in her press statement.

Meanwhile, Vijay Mallya has asked the British government for a loan so that he can take bail and avoid going to jail. The British government has reportedly told Mallya that if the loan is not repaid, he will have to give “teen guna lagaan” along with selling Virat Kohli to the England cricket team from Royal Challengers Bangalore.

Secret sources reveal that the Indian government has asked Mallya to steal the Kohinoor before being deported to India as he has to go to jail anyway. Mallya has considered this seriously as he may well be able to pay his loans by selling it to India.