Raheel Sharif, Pakistan army’s ex-general has been given an award by the Pak-China think tank with the unfortunate name, R.A.N.D.I. (Research and Developement International) This is not usual practice, but due to Raheel Sharif’s contribution to Pakistan-China relations, they are giving him an award A.S.S., Adaptive Suggestible Soldier.
Raheel Sharif, who is also Nawaz Sharif’s unofficial boss, was replaced by Qamar Bajwa as Chief of Army Staff. Nawaz Sharif, Pakistan’s PM is the only person in the world who appoints his own boss. Our reports tell us that in a meeting held with cabinet ministers and the army chief, Nawaz Sharif wouldn’t respond when anyone reffered to him as Mr. Sharif. When he was asked why, he said, “When people said Mr. Sharif, they generally didn’t want to speak with me. They didn’t think I was the Sharif with any power.” He then looked towards Raheel Sharif’s replacement, Qamar Bajwa, and said hopefully, “This time it will be different Bajwa ji?”, to which Qamar Bajwa laughed and replied, “Rehn de, beta-jaan”(Leave it, son).
Raheel Sharif’s last day was marked with a terror attack on Indian forces in J&K. Or as Pakistan calls it, “Foreign Policy”. Several political analysts have recommended Pakistan dismantle the Foreign affairs ministry. It is powerless and just wastes tax payers money.
Raheel Sharif’s parting speech had the word ‘Kashmir’ 668 times, and RAW(Research and Analysis Wing) 546 times, India 10670 times. With Pakistan having the best institutes for Terror Studies(their own IITs- International Institute of Terrorism), Raheel Sharif’s speech didn’t contain anything much about terrorists. He spoke a lot about ‘Indian terrorists’, magical invisible creatures which only he seems to see. He ranted about Kashmir for the duration of the speech, while his boss Hafiz Saeed nodded his approval.
Raheel Sharif expressed disappointment on demonetization since everyone has something to say about it. He said India has destroyed the livelihood of so many poor Pakistanis who worked in Lahore, Quetta and Peshawar, printing Indian notes with more enthusiasm than Pakistan ruppee notes. He said such hardworking Pakistans love India as much as Pakistan. He repeatedly said that Pakistan wants peace with India, only evil RAW doesn’t want it. His last command was to go to the UN to complain, which foreign office spokesperson Zakaria already did. Even if your boss is leaving, it is best not to anger him.